Sometimes the people we work with ask us to add value.
And we’re like, “hey man, no problem, one order of value coming right up!” Because that’s what we do.
We’re adding value all over the shop at the Department of Words. It’s a veritable conveyor belt of value-addage. There’s reams of the stuff just lying around. And there’s nothing we like better than sticking it all over your briefs, along with some glitter and dry pasta shells.
“Don’t mind us,” we say “we’re just over here, adding some lovely value to all your ads. Hope you’re ready for this big pile of value coming your way.”
In fact, sometimes (just for giggles) we like to take some value away. Like a giant game of value Jenga. We take turns to pull it out from the bottom, until the whole campaign is teetering on one very dubious double entendre in the headline.
I do worry though, that a person only get’s a limited amount of value in their career. What if we’re using ours up too quickly? We could end up in value debt, having to steal crumbs of it from the art directors when they’re not looking. It’s a troubling thought.
Maybe we should switch to writing words that make sense and help people understand things instead? I think it could work. We’re going to need some rebranding though. With fewer bullshit phrases. And less glitter probably.